How to integrate a second kitten

Hi all, we've dried our house as best we can and look almost back to normal now - we're waiting for loss adjusters etc before the house gets rid of that lovely damp smell but we've now got dry carpets everywhere except one room. So I decided to collect Wicca and bring her home yesterday afternoon, and although my breeder warned me that Freyja would hiss and growl at Wicca - and at me - I wasn't prepared for Freyja to isolate herself the way she has. I've got Feliway plugged in downstairs in the kitchen, which is also where food bowls and litter trays live, but Freyja will not venture down there and Wicca will not venture up. I brought little Wicca up stairs into the middle floor last night, so Freyja locked herself away on the top floor. I ended up taking bowls of food and water into our bedroom, plus Freyja's litter tray, because it became apparent that she'll not venture downstairs to the kitchen.

Every time Freyja hears Wicca call out from the kitchen, she freezes and hisses. Every time I talk to Freyja, she hisses and growls at me. She's just jumped up on my desk whilst I'm typing this, gave me a head bump and let me fuss her, then jumped on her Tower and curled up to watch me - so I went to give her a head rump and got a hiss and a growl for my trouble.

No idea what to do for the best. Wicca now - technically - has free run of the entire house (even though she won't leave the dining room) and Freyja has limited herself to just one floor. Not what I intended at all.

Should I put Wicca's food/water bowls and litter tray in our bedroom so that Freyja can have the rest of the house to herself again? I didn't do that yesterday as Freyja loves sleeping in our room with us when we go to bed.

Any thoughts??

Hi

Timmy was no problem - Sarah was awful when I first got Zack but they gradually got over it and as you see from the picture they are best friends now

I dont know what is best but I made up a room for Zack and kept him in there with his own beds, toys, tray and food bowl and brought him out for supervised visits for the first couple of days and put him back in there. I would go down to the room and play with him alone and then come out and fuss the others. After day 2 I left the door open and he ventured out himself and that was when sarah went berserk. I followed them around and seperated her from him and gave her a fuss .

After another couple of days I resorted to the water spray ( works best for Sarah) if she got too nasty and it worked because the next day the hissing stopped they could sit in the same room.

I still left his tray in his room for a couple of weeks and then slowly moved it out to the cat run and moved his food with the others when he started running into the laundry himself at food time.

I left all the Timmy and Sarah's food and toys etc where they always were

One of those things I think - it worked for me but may not for others

PS - I know that awful feeling tho - I remember thinking Sarah was going to kill him to start with - she would bail him in a corner and go for him. I think I posted in a panic but got reassurance from this forum and all went ok in the end

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by FreyjaRoMaine

Hi all, we've dried our house as best we can and look almost back to normal now - we're waiting for loss adjusters etc before the house gets rid of that lovely damp smell but we've now got dry carpets everywhere except one room. So I decided to collect Wicca and bring her home yesterday afternoon, and although my breeder warned me that Freyja would hiss and growl at Wicca - and at me - I wasn't prepared for Freyja to isolate herself the way she has. I've got Feliway plugged in downstairs in the kitchen, which is also where food bowls and litter trays live, but Freyja will not venture down there and Wicca will not venture up. I brought little Wicca up stairs into the middle floor last night, so Freyja locked herself away on the top floor. I ended up taking bowls of food and water into our bedroom, plus Freyja's litter tray, because it became apparent that she'll not venture downstairs to the kitchen.

Every time Freyja hears Wicca call out from the kitchen, she freezes and hisses. Every time I talk to Freyja, she hisses and growls at me. She's just jumped up on my desk whilst I'm typing this, gave me a head bump and let me fuss her, then jumped on her Tower and curled up to watch me - so I went to give her a head rump and got a hiss and a growl for my trouble.

No idea what to do for the best. Wicca now - technically - has free run of the entire house (even though she won't leave the dining room) and Freyja has limited herself to just one floor. Not what I intended at all.

Should I put Wicca's food/water bowls and litter tray in our bedroom so that Freyja can have the rest of the house to herself again? I didn't do that yesterday as Freyja loves sleeping in our room with us when we go to bed.

Any thoughts??

---

There are many ways to integrate a new kitten though I always advise my new owners to let the new baby be alone for a week or so.. in a room with either you and or on her own with you paying lots of visits, moving to new homes is the biggest stress some kitties can have and if they are hiding anything nasty then it comes out round about now!!

But I will take it that all is okay health wise..

I would suggest little introductions slowly, NEVER rush them...

I have a big pen I use and I put the newbie in there for a while to give the established kitty's time to smell out the newcomer... then slowly open the door and take it easy!
Moving litter trays, food bowl, water not a good idea confusion all the way around and one of the main causes of dirty kitties.. even kitty's that have been clean before can become dirty..

Never force the introduction, there is no rush!

Growling and spitting even at you is par for the course...

Take time talking to them in that soft silly voice we all use with our cats, talking to them both, using their names.. and let them do it at their own pace!

I have just brought in an Abyssinian from a well trusted breeder, he has already lived on his own for some time, so no stress about nastys... he spends all the time here walking around growling and spitting even at us.. My own cats just look at him... he is desperate to play... you can see it.. after 1 week he is still walking around grumbling to him self but he has just started to play!!

The somali kitty I bought at the same time.. Well he has lived here all his life... nothing phases him and nothing luckily phases my cats cause he is a real loon!!


It takes time.. it can be a matter of days it can sometimes be weeks.. and never presume always they will be best buddies sometimes that can happen.. THEY tolerate one another... lol But in most case the owner gets stressed and this rubs off on the kitty's Chill!!:winkwink:

Oops... I hadn't read your earlier post about the flooding. You have my sympathy... glad to hear things are a bit better now.

As for the integration problem... I am familiar with the hissing and growling. In our household it only lasted a couple of days. Tatja hissed at Monty for two days before deciding he wasn't such a bad sort after all. And both of them hissed and growled at little Minnie for a bit, but that grew less and less. In a matter of days they had totally accepted her and everything went back to normal.
Minnie did hide under the bed at first, but I left her food and water in the kitchen so she had to come out and eat with the others, which she did.
Her breeder told us not to interfere in case of 'hostilities'... she said the cats have to work it out among themselves. So we went about the normal daily routine, no special protection for the newcomer, no keeping them apart, etc. We just let them stew in their own fat, so to speak.
I'm sorry I can't give you any better advice than this... but of course it's only been a very short while since Wicca arrived. It might take a couple of days for them to get used to the new situation.
Good luck and hugs for both girls!:smile:

Was sad to see Fryja's empty pen at the show but so pleased for you that there is some form of normality for you at home,amongst the hissing....
I have always kept the newbie of the household seperate for a few nights but during the day as long as we were about we have just had open house & let them get on with things,Bruce was awful to Merlyn when he arrived & Bruce plus Merlyn were awful to Shims & Welly,lots of the hissing & growling & Bruce not wanting his cuddles but eventually they all worked themselves out & harmony reigns most of the time.
Strange thing happened to me with the Feliway though,when daughter was moving back home to live with her two cats I decided to use the diffuser to see if it would keep mine calmer,it done the complete opposite to Shimba,when Lynne arrived she said Shims looked spacey & his eyes were glazed,I went to pick him up to have a look & ended up bit & scratched for my efforts & him a quaking heap under the bed,we got rid of the diffuser, shut all the other cats up, opened all the doors & windows for a couple of hours,bl***y cold because it wasn't the warmest time of the year but when Shims came out of the bedroom he was his usual loving self,would never risk using it again,I suffered & the cats all got on fine !
Will follow the next few traumatic days with interest & wait for the excitement the first time they actually get into the same room together,you think you are winning with them & then they take two steps back before starting again,how many of us have been there,done it,got that T shirt......x

Don't worry, Karen - Hobbes hissed both of us when we introduced Alice and after three days, they were playing quite happily. Same thing when we introduced Paddy and now they are inseparable. Like Antonia, we didn't even try to separate them - Paddy slept in the ensuite right next to the nice basket we provided and Hobbes slept under the bed, emerging to glower at the interloper from time to time. This lasted all of two days, so I wouldn't worry. I'm sure Freyja and Wicca will soon be romping happily together.
Hope the loss adjusters get their fingers out and you can soon be rid of the damp smell!
Hugs, Pam

Thanks everyone for your advice. Thought I'd give you a bit of an update...

So, since her arrival, Wicca has adopted the dining room as her base of operations; it took a bit of coaxing but she's sussed where food and litter trays are and happily uses both as when necessary. This morning I'm working from home and she's venturing out into the larger part of the house, with regular brief visits to the study where I'm based. She's incredibly playful and super affectionate - not sure she's up to Candes's Loverboy levels but she's certainly more demonstrable than Freyja was when we first brought her home.

Freyja, locked herself in the top floor of the house - two floors away from food and litter tray, and a floor away from water. Saturday night I brought a tray up to our bedroom and some kibble as it was clear Freyja wasn't going to leave the bedroom and as she HATES to be shut out of our lives I had no intention of locking her out of our room by putting Wicca in with us. Sunday morning, tray and food went back down to the kitchen (the kitchen is next to the dining room, so food and toilet facilities are on the same floor as the room Wicca has adopted). Since Sunday morning, Freyja - to my knowledge - hasn't eaten anything. She may have used her litter tray since it's been back in the kitchen, but I'm not sure about timing.

I expected this hissing, growling and anti-social behaviour, but I didn't expect Freyja to isolate herself in part of the house. So today, we've shut the doors to the top floor rooms to force her to mooch about in other parts of the house. We're not forcing the two cats together, just cutting off the places Freyja can hide to avoid Wicca.

With all the hissing and growling, Freyja hasn't given us the impression that she'll attack Wicca, but she's tried to box me several times when I've decided to fuss her regardless of the growling - not sure how best to manage her when she's in that mood, but I wanted to show her that nothing would make me love her less, even growling and hissing at me. I realise I maybe crediting my puss with far more emotional intelligence than a feline deserves though! Whilst Wicca's been invading the study today, I've noticed that Freyja's hissing and growling has reduced considerably (at least at Wicca; I'm still getting it in the neck though) so I think that must be a good sign. And Freyja's not angry 24/7, either.

So I'm not worried that Wicca's going to be beaten up, and I'm much less worried about the abuse directed at me, especially after reading some of your experiences, as I suspect that this will pass. What bothers me at the moment is Freyja locking herself away and not eating, so I've brought some food into the study today just to make sure she's put something away, but I figure if I keep doing that it'll make it easier for her to avoid the bottom floor. And I'd like to let her out in the garden as she loves it out there and sees it as a treat, but I'm worried that she'll get the wrong message (i.e. that she's not wanted) or that she'll try and leg it over the fence.

And the smell of damp is still here, with no loss adjuster arriving until Wednesday now. Fortunately, the study ceiling hasn't bowed any further, so I'm optimistic that it won't collapse! Whilst squashing both my cats under a fallen ceiling might resolve one of my immediate issues, it's not got much longevity!

Fortunately, the study ceiling hasn't bowed any further, so I'm optimistic that it won't collapse! Whilst squashing both my cats under a fallen ceiling might resolve one of my immediate issues, it's not got much longevity![/QUOTE]

Oh Karen that bit made me smile,I do feel so sorry for you but to still have a sense of humour must help.
You might find that Freyja is blaming you on two accounts,not only have you brought a new funny four legged furry thing in but you have also spoilt her house,she is most probaly feeling insecure about her surroundings as well,the smell she associates with home has gone & the replacement odour leaves a bit to be desired.I am sure the other will work out though,when our two ganged up on the two new babies Bruce was really awful to them & us,Merl would hiss & walk past but Bruce snarled & hissed like a wild cat & if I spoke he would hiss at me & walk away,he didn't go off his food but gave up coming for cuddles,I really did begin to wonder if we had done the right thing,he eased out with me though by being allowed to come to bed with me on his own for a special half hour at night,no one else allowed in,I just sat on the bed & done crosswords & eventually he came & laid down near me & then he laid across my legs & from there he got better with me,I always kept just talking to him during the day but didn't go in for cuddles & it was nearly a couple of weeks before we got back onto the same footing as before,did take a bit longer to give up on babes but now he is fine,he came down to bed a couple of mornings ago & Shims gave him a head & ear wash,now Bruce waits for Shims & goes & puts his head under him to have his daily clean,it will happen.....

Really good advice from Jackie again. Yes the damp smell in your house can't be helping much either, it's easy to forget how much animals can be affected by smell. It's early days yet with your new babe, so I'm sure things will improve. Good luck Karen! xxx

Freyja’s hiding away must be very unsettling for you.
A cat whose territory is being invaded can feel upset and threatened. But the newbie is far too busy checking out her new home to be bothered by any hostile behaviour. They often act as if they don’t even notice the other one’s hissing and growling!
I get the impression that Freyja, for all her playfulness and sweet antics, is in fact a far more timid kitty than she seems to be. You said yourself she wasn’t all that affectionate at first. Possibly Freyja is the insecure one whilst Wicca is the confident one – different personalities, just like people.
But if Wicca really is the outgoing and affectionate type, she’ll be looking for a playmate soon. And then she could very well start making advances toward Freyja and try to win her confidence.
I think you’re doing well by giving Freyja lots of attention in the meantime. Also some extra-special food, treats, or a new toy might help her feel better.
Hang on in there and keep us posted!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by jckkerrison

the smell she associates with home has gone & the replacement odour leaves a bit to be desired.

---

Right on... I wouldn't be surprised at all if the strange smell also has an impact.:nod:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Antonia

I get the impression that Freyja, for all her playfulness and sweet antics, is in fact a far more timid kitty than she seems to be. You said yourself she wasn’t all that affectionate at first. Possibly Freyja is the insecure one whilst Wicca is the confident one – different personalities, just like people.

---

Thanks Antonia, and yes, I've started to come to the same conclusion today - at one point Wicca ventured into the study, squeaking away to let us all know she was on her way, and Freyja hopped up onto my desk and hid behind my laptop screen, hissing and growling over the top of it - she'd literally taken the high ground, but still hid to threaten Wicca, and I wondered then if Freyja's more insecure than I initially gave her credit for - guess she'd got quite confident when it was just me, her and OH.

And Jackie, Antonia and Howlinbob - that's a really good thought about the damp smell; it didn't occur to me that Freyja might be affected by that too; she seemed to treat the whole flood as an adventure as she had several new faces to flirt with before we got back, and I just didn't give it a second thought.

My breeder's suggested locking them both in a room with Feliway and leaving them to it - I'm not sure I'm quite brave enough for that yet but it might be worth a thought by the end of the week. Where can I buy cat-shaped boxing gloves??

I think I might have had a break through tonight - I blackmailed Freyja into entering the kitchen for food, putting the food high up so that Wicca couldn't nick it (man, that kitten's got an appetite and she has absolutely NO manners either - the only thing she didn't do after stuffing her face was belch and wipe a paw across her gob, but I'm sure it's just a matter of time...) and whilst I had to stroke her and talk to her, she did actually eat. I made a point of feeding her first, and she curled up on the breakfast bar for a bit, so I got out a teaser and we had some larks in the kitchen. Then I decided to get Wicca's food out and Freyja started jumping up the kitchen worktop for some of that, so I put the bowl down on the floor and she tucked in merrily, then wandered around re-sniffing the kitchen. She even warily wandered into the dining room but left again without incident. She's hissed and growled at Wicca since as I brought the poor little mite up from the dining room to join civilised society in the lounge, and after a quick explore round the room Wicca decided to head back to the dining room again.

Can't tell you what a source of relief it is coming on this forum and realising that this is - sadly - perfectly normal. Did all of you stress out about it or am I just being incredibly soft?? In any case, thank you, I'm grateful for the advice and patience!:shy:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by FreyjaRoMaine

I made a point of feeding her first

---

Funny you mention that... when handing out treats, we always make sure to give Tatja the first treat, then Monty, and the last one is for Minnie. Perhaps it's just symbolical because Tatja has had to tolerate two invaders and we want her to feel she'll always be our First Lady. But I suspect in reality the cats have a very different pecking order where Minnie is Top Cat and poor old Monty is Bottom Cat.:LOL:

With all due respect, I am not keen on the suggestion from the breeder. It would make Freyja feel even more insecure and abandoned if you locked her somewhere she can't run to you for comfort.

And yes, we were stressed out as well when introducing the newcomers... I even had a very long talk about my fears with Minnie's breeder before taking Minnie. :nod:

But I understand there's already developments with Freyja and Wicca. That is interesting. Don't expect the hissing/growling to stop suddenly... it's a gradual process.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by FreyjaRoMaine

Did all of you stress out about it or am I just being incredibly soft??

---

Stress out?? Oh, boy, did I ever!! It had been something like 10 years since the last kitten introduction and Alice was such a wee thing compared to Hobbes. He was growling and hissing like a cat possessed and I was convinced that they would NEVER get on. True to form, after a couple of days Alice was Hobbes' BFF.

Then I remembered the problem I had when I lived in a flat in London and introduced a new male Burmese kitten to our older Burmese lad. I really DID think we'd have to re-home the kitten - it was open warfare until we realised that perhaps they actually needed a litter tray EACH (Sim'lar the kitten used to prevent Oosa from using the shared tray - putting the second tray in was a real lightbulb moment). It took several weeks for them to shake down together - our fault in a way for not knowing how to integrate Sim'lar and of course there was no internet back then to consult. In the finish, they became close buddies and Sim'lar mourned dreadfully when Oosa died.

So, honey, no.......you aren't being incredibly soft - despite the fact that I "knew" Hobbes and Paddy would settle down together, I still worried for the first few days.

Oh, and as for Wicca's table manners.........Paddy is exactly the same (and a dreadful thief to boot - we dare not leave any food of ANY kind out or the Brown Cat Burglar will have it away).:LOL:

Hugs, Pam

I know a couple of you have posted support and concern in another thread and I just want to say thanks again to everyone. Not been an easy week - between having a difficult time at work, a house that feels grimy because I can see the water damage, and the kittens not getting on it's been interesting. I know there are two schools of thought about integrating an additional cat so I had to choose between 'letting them get on with it' or putting Wicca in a separate room for a few days. I opted for the first option as it was also was a couple of friends and my breeder recommended.

So, here we are a week and one day later and I am happy to report that hostilities have calmed considerable. Don't get me wrong, we're not at the stage where we could call the girls 'friends' but the hissing and growling has ALMOST stopped; occasionally Freyja will hiss at Wicca but it's become more of a rarity, and there's next to no growling. Freyja is spending less time stalking Wicca, and now seems genuinely more curious about her than threatened by her.

I'm now not so sure that Freyja was ever deliberately trying to stop Wicca getting to food bowls or litter tray - I didn't see it myself and as OH has been quite dejected about the whole week and needs to be reminded sometimes that the hissing has gradually reduced, I'm not sure that he didn't read more into it.

We're not yet at the point where they'll play together, although Wicca tries to play with Freyja. Freyja tends to treat her with contempt most of the time and doesn't respond or react, which is another positive sign I think.

Now when Freyja chases Wicca around the house, there is no hissing, growling or extended claws, and Wicca will often chase her right back - again, aside from thudding fluffy shovels on the stairs, there's no noise to speak of. Although we have heard the MC chirp when they've been chasing each other which I think must also be a good sign.

And instead of creeping up close to grown and hiss, Freyja tends to creep up close to have a good sniff. When Wicca reciprocates, Freyja seems to let her.

Last night we went out for a few hours and because the aggression seems to have passed decided to let them get on with it - hence the reason we only went out for two hours though! And it was a relief when we got home to a) find Wicca intact; b) that they seemed to have existed in the same room without a fight and c) that Freyja did what she normally does when she's been on her own for an hour or more and trotted down to the kitchen to greet us.

We've had two major breakthroughs this morning when we first saw Freyja lounging about on our bed and Wicca hauled herself up to join her - they were both lolling about in quite relaxed poses and were only about 4 inches from each other. Wicca decided she wanted to play with Freyja, who wasn't in the mood, and just shifted her face a couple of inches further round rather than jumping down off the bed and out of the room. And right now, they are both sharing the Tigga Tower, albeit on separate levels. Not something I thought we'd ever see a week ago.

Litter trays and food bowls are now all back in the kitchen, although being kept separate for the time being - we'll see how things go before we decide whether to move things together.

I can't describe the cats as friends, but it now seems likely that they will at least get on, so watch this space... who knows what will happen in anther week. Freyja's not her old self yet but we've seen glimpses of her over the last couple of days. No real idea what's changed to make her more relaxed with Wicca - could be double-dose Feliway, could be Zylkene, could be time, or all three!

How nice to see an update from you!
I already suspected you needed to take some time out, for all the reasons you mentioned.

And what progress the girls have made! The way you describe it, it reminds me very much of how Tatja got used to Minnie… with Tatja's hissing and walking away gradually subsiding until it became more like ‘going through the motions’ than real hostility.

Wicca tries to play with Freyja...
Reminds me of the way little Minnie kept trying to coax Tatja into playing and cuddling… and eventually succeeded.

Thanks for the update. This is all very good news. I think by this time next week you will have two happy girls who enjoy each other’s company!

I agree with Antonia its great to have an update & also agree that before long you will have two happy babes,when I look at all of mine & think of the times when we have wondered if we had done the right thing & now you see them all together you know it was worth it.We still have ups & downs with them but don't you always in all walks of life,the latest was after Pansy P had been so poorly,for some reason Shimba stepped down as top cat while she was ill & Merlyn thought he would take over the reins again,he growls & hisses at them all & strutts around which in turn was making a couple of the others upset with each other & gradually all of them were getting unsettled again,then a few days after Pansy P had recovered & settled back into her old routine Shims decided enough was enough Merl done one hiss too many & for his trouble was chased down the hall full pelt by Shims who just gently tapped him round the ear with a paw,sat & glared at him for a few seconds & then walked away,top cat again & peace reins once more amoungst them all.Moral here being that it doesn't mean to say Freyja will end up top cat but they will be best friends,until the next one comes along & they both gang up on that one...... Yes/No !!!!

That's great news Karen, so glad that they are starting to settle down. I'm sure you'll be posting some pictures of them soon, looking like friends, or even having a cuddle, you never know. It's a very stressful time but you are surely emerging from it now. How about that drink?....

So here we are, another couple of days on, and things are looking really good, at least between the two furries. Over the last few days, we've seen them chasing each other; wrestling; sharing the same room (not something we saw AT ALL last week); peering in each others food bowls whilst one's actually eating; and co-existing on the same Tigga Tower. Last night they both sprawled out on our bed together and then chased Freyja's favourite teaser around until my arm ached. And today - this is fantastic - today, they've shared the same platform on the Tigga Tower (and given Freyja's size now, this is no small feat of engineering); even the builder we've got in was surprised at how much things have changed. And if that wasn't all amazing enough, they actually started grooming each other this afternoon. I felt like I'd seen baby's first steps.

Freyja's still not entirely back to her old self, although some of that might be residual Zylkene in her system (she's not had any today and they've still got on great). She's not ready to play hide and seek with us yet (suspect it's more fun to play with Wicca than either of us though, so I can't blame her on that score!). And she still hisses at me and OH sometimes - I'm trying to see if there's a pattern or trigger behind that and THINK it happens when she's seen me fuss Wicca, irrespective of the fact that Freyja gets heaps more fuss than Wicca does. Wicca's a true lapcat and loves cuddles and fuss, easily spending an hour hopping between mine and OH's lap.

I was concerned that Wicca was so dominant when she first arrived that Freyja was just made more insecure - when she first started 'hanging' with Wicca, she seemed to be a bit like the school geek that was in awe of the school cool kid, putting Wicca firmly in charge. Things seem to have evened themselves out now and Wicca tends to follow Freyja around quite a bit and I guess that might have helped Psycho settle down again.

So, it's all looking pretty bloomin' good. Once PK is fully back to her old self (and every day she gets a tiny bit more like it) life will be peachy. Even with 6 de-humidifiers rumbling on 24/7 and two doors that won't fit their frames anymore!

Isn't it a great feeling when it all comes together,lovely photos of them side by side,can we all say "told you"it would happen,sorry it is all being spoiled for you by the de-humidifiers,it is obviously going to be a lot longer for you before things even start to be back to normal in the house,keep us updated on both babes & home....

Karen, their progress is wonderful! Funny how the home pet will go through so many emotions and stages when a new furfam member is introduced. It's a huge adjustment and it sounds like your 2 kitties are working out their budding friendship nicely now. Sharing space, playing, grooming each other! What happy relief you must feel. :AddEmoticons00918:

Phew! So pleased for you all - and there are those pictures of the girls I asked for a couple of weeks back, hurrah! Looks like you're almost home and dry....well, you will be when the builders have finished! (doing a happy dance for you right now!)

That is so cool! I am really happy for you all.
I remember how delighted I was when a newbie finally cuddled up to the older cat, grooming and touching noses… like you say, it’s like watching a baby’s first steps.

I think your Wicca scores high on EQ. She has oodles of social skills. You and Freyja are lucky to have such a clever little diplomat around!

We too noticed our cats’ attitude towards us humans changed each time a new cat arrived. They become less of lapcats and more oriented on each other. Over here, the newest arrival has always been the most people-oriented. I suppose it’s only natural.

Really looking forward to seeing many more pictures of your gorgeous girls together!

Another update on progress and a question if I may...

Litter trays - two down in the kitchen, they both use both trays - happy to share. Freyja even covered up one of Wicca's little parcels at the weekend (odd, as she doesn't usually bother covering her own up, but there you go).

Water bowls - two water fountains on two floors mean that they can easily share, and seem happy to do so.

Food bowls - Separate food bowls but they are now both at the same 'feeding station' in the kitchen. Freyja is naturally a grazer but Guts scoffs her grub and then hunts down Freyja's so she's also taken to ramming as much in as she can. Now the bowls are side by side, the gorging seems to have calmed down which is a relief. They share a bowl of kibble to graze on all day - both get a look in so that's all good.

Bedding - one giant Tigga Tower large enough to easily sleep three giant MC's, so there's plenty of room for both of them. Freyja's now happy to share her platform with Wicca (although to be fair, she's had no choice) and they curl up and keep each others noses warm. Very sweet, and such a blessed relief! The've even shared the igloo at the very top of the tower.

Playing - hanging out together most of the day and parts of the evening; Wicca likes a cuddle when we're home and Freyja's taken to hopping back up on the sofa to sit next to us, whether Wicca's on a lap or not (so nice to have her do that again). They chase each other round the house (in DM's by all accounts) and enjoy a bit of mischief together (what with Wicca's kleptomania and Freyja in awe).

So I'd see it's almost Utopia here now. Neither cat is even slightly peturbed by the blasted dehumidifiers and they both quite like being blasted across the room by the industrial (cat safe) fans.

The only concerns I have left are:

1. Freyja is still grumpy, very easily irritated and much more aggressive than she ever was before Wicca arrived - is this likely to be the way things are, or will this also calm down in time?
2. No matter how much fuss and attention Freyja gets, she still has a hissy fit (literally) if you try to fuss her after Wicca's had attention - what might cause this? Is it simple jealousy? OH thought it might be that she was cross we were playing with HER cat - could that be true?
3. Is there anything I can do to help Freyja get back to her old self? I accept that we'll get less attention than we used to now she's got a playmate, and I'm fine with that; but it doesn't suit her to be cross and aggressive.

Any thoughts? Am I being impatient? I'm pretty chilled about the whole thing - I know that cats can pick up on that kind of thing and I'm genuinely so relieved that we've got this far in the first place that if this is Freyja's 'new personality' I'll accept it, but I just want to make sure I'm not doing anything to aggravate it. Or whether I can do something to help.

1 I think in time she will calm down more,she is still trying to prove a point.Just ignore
her irritations,she is most probaly trying it on for attention,goody goodies don't get noticed first not even amoungst us two legged people.

2 Hissy fit after Wicca has had attention,I would say still jealousy,even now after three years if my breeder friend walks in & speaks to one of the babies first he hisses at her,doesn't apply to the other three only to the two others that she bred,if she has touched one of them he hisses & walks out.We think it is because he isn't getting the attention first from "nannie"& wants to prove a point to make sure next time he gets the attention he thinks he deserves.

3 Give it time,it was not that long ago you didn't think things would be this good.

I don't think you are being impatient,like us all we want everything to be just right yesterday,I bet in six months you will be wondering if all this other really happened...

I hadn't thought of it like that, Candes, and I'll definately give it a go. Wicca does seem to go out of her way to annoy Freyja; reminds me of me and my lil sis when we were kids and I've got some sympathy for Freyja! I also sometimes think that Wicca jumps from my lap to OH's every few minutes just to wind Freyja up, but I suspect I'm crediting cats with a bit too much strategic thinking!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by candes

Just keep the youngin from annoying the heck out of Freya too much. :LOL: Freyja will appretiate you gently scolding Wiica for palying too much or too rough with her. "Oh my mommie the protector". It will make her feel more "important". If Wicca won't listen then she gets some "time out" until her kitten energy winds down a bit. This will calm down Freyja a bit too. And gives you both some queit snuggle time. Just do what you can to keep the house calm and quiet.

---

Now, I'll be honest, I read this and thought "surely cats really don't think like that", and was pretty cynical. However, if I'm not prepared to listen to advice I shouldn't ask for it in the first place and so far all advice given has been sound. So I put my cynicism to one side and when the first opportunity presented itself, I gave this a go.

Freyja was lolling about on her TT platform and Wicca was in the basket below, and decided that Freyja's tail looked like a great toy to sink her teeth and claws into. I watched Freyja's ears and tail move into 'not again' mode and made a point of telling Wicca off, moving her paws away from Freyja's tail. Had to do this a few times and eventually she stopped. I then scratched Freyja's head, expecting her to flatten her ears and make her funny little warning meow, but it never came - she let me scratch her ears and leaned into my hand.

Second opportunity: Wicca fills her face from her own bowl and before she's completely cleaned it out, she knocks Freyja out of the way and gets stuck into hers. So I picked her up, told her off and put her back in front of her own bowl. Did this a couple of times and encouraged Freyja to carry on eating each time. Stroked her head - no aeroplane ears, just a slow blink at me.

There's been another couple of occasions where I've moved Wicca or 'stuck up' for Freyja and it could be coincidence but for the last two days she hasn't hissed at me, she hasn't been cross when I've tried to fuss her, and instead she's jumped up on the sofa to sit next to me, and let me stroke her for nearly an hour today. So this weekend, it finally feels like she's back. After letting me fuss her for all that time, Wicca sprawled out next to her and when Freyja got too hot she got up, turned round and then gave Wicca a really loving grooming round her face, ears and ruff. Wicca just purred.

I am one happy MC owner.:rofl:

Wicca’s behavior toward Freyja is so much like Minnie’s toward Monty. She tries to steal his food and he gets intimidated. So I do what you do – I place myself between her and him so that he can eat in peace. He clearly appreciates it… and what’s more, Minnie gets the message (she’s a clever little thing she is). Gradually, she’s becoming less of a tealeaf.

Funny thing happened the other night. I had bought a tin of sardines in water. First, I drained the tin and poured the water onto a plate for the Coonies. When they’d lapped it up, I took a fork and put some chunks of sardine on the plate. They gobbled it up. Then I tasted a chunk of sardine… mmmm, tasted good! Gave some more to the furries. Ate some more myself. Then I heard giggling. I looked up and saw a couple of teenagers peering through our kitchen window at the crazy old cat lady sitting cross-legged on the floor sharing food out of a tin with her cats.:rofl: